The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water - Movie Review

The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water (2015)

The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water is the second film of the now trilogy, all the voice actors for the main characters from the show and the first movie reprise their roles plus we get Antonio Banderas as the villain, Burger Beard. The film is about SpongeBob and Plankton teaming up to find the krabby patty secret formula after it magically disappears, and once they discover where it is, the whole gang team up on land to get it back and get Bikini Bottom back to normal. The film was released on February 6th, 2015 (5 and a half years ago, that's fucking crazy!), and received positive reviews from critics and mixed reviews from audiences. The film was a box office success, earning $325 million on a $74 million budget.

THE GOOD

I highly enjoy this film! It's got very good fast paced humor, the 2D and 3D animation is extremely good, and I loved the story. SpongeBob and Plankton carry the first two acts splendidly! They have terrific comedic chemistry, I genuinely wanted to see them succeed at their mission! The thing about this film is that it keeps the characters as likable and funny as you remember them. The story was tons of fun, very creative and never dull! This movie offers everything, it's a fantasy movie, a superhero movie, a dystopian apocalypse movie, a time travel movie, you name it! There are times where this movie kinda felt like a stoner movie too. During the time travel part of the movie, there are these trippy as fuck transitions between times they travel to. The thing I appreciated the most about this movie is that most of the movie is 2D animation! Technically it's false advertisement judging by the trailers but I was happy that this movie didn't go all CGI happy! The final act, where the CGI aspect really comes into play was pretty exciting, granted in a SpongeBob fashion, it's not large scale like Avengers or anything. I really enjoyed seeing the characters use their powers given to them in a creative way.

THE BAD

I really didn't like Burger Beard as a character. Whenever they cut to him I was always like "Can we get back to SpongeBob please?" It was the same feeling I always had watching a SpongeBob episode featuring Patchy the Pirate. There's also a couple of pretty lazy jokes.

CONCLUSION

Is Sponge Out of Water perfect? No, but if you like SpongeBob, it's definitely worth a watch! It has a fun story, it embraces 2D animation, the characters are as great as ever, for the most part the comedy is great! 

8.2/10 - GREAT

Pros:

- Great animation

- Fun story

- Characters are still funny and likable

- Humor is mostly great

Cons:

- Burger Beard as a character

- A couple of lazy jokes

FILM INFO

MPA rating:  PG (for mild action and rude humor)

Run time:  92 min

Release date:  February 6th, 2015

Studio:  Paramount Pictures 

Kalifornia - Movie Review

Kalifornia (1993)

Kalifornia is a thriller film that was released in 1993, directed by Dominic Sena and stars Brad Pitt, Juliette Lewis, and is about a couple of journalists who go on a cross country trip to research serial killers, but little do they know that they are travelling with a psychopath. The film received mixed reviews at the time of release and was a box office bomb, earning $2.4 million on a budget of $8.5 million.

THE GOOD

Kalifornia is many things, exciting, suspenseful, violent, all that good stuff. The cinematography is fantastic, the film really lets you see that American landscape, and it's breathtaking! I also love how grainy this movie is, it really helps elevate the grittiness and dirtiness of this movie. The performances are fucking phenomenal! By far the best performance here is Brad Pitt! The guy plays a damn good psychopath! His character is a real piece of shit, and seeing Brad Pitt acting like a complete lunatic was so much fun to watch! I also loved Juliette Lewis as Brad Pitt's simple minded, kind hearted girlfriend. Throughout the movie you really develop a lot of sympathy for her, her backstory is really tragic and the way you hear about how Brad Pitt's character treats and eventually how you see him treat her really makes you despise Brad Pitt's character even more. It felt like there was a neverending sense of dread throughout the movie, it always felt like something awful could happen at any given moment. The final act of the movie is very intense and exciting, it has all the excitement, tension and violence you could want from a movie like this. One of my favorite things about this movie is that it doesn't force the violence either, it makes it count when it happens, you really have to be patient instead of opting to be trashy entertainment. I love me some trashy entertainment, but it's a breath of fresh air to see a movie like this actually trying to be a film.

THE BAD

This is sort of a nitpick, but I do think the violence could have been more graphic, not to be trashy or anything, just to increase the intensity a bit. Green Room is a perfect example of a movie that has extremely graphic violence and manages to not have it be for the sake of having gore.

CONCLUSION

Kalifornia is a wonderful thriller. It has the right tone, the right amount of violence, it has fantastic performances, the cinematography is gorgeous and it's intense as shit!

9.5/10  -  AMAZING

Pros:

- Great tone

- Perfect cinematography 

- Performances (Brad Pitt in particular)

- Goes for genuine quality rather than trashy entertainment

Cons:

- Violence could've been more graphic to increase intensity (nitpick)

FILM DETAILS:

MPA rating:  R (for strong violence, and for sexuality and language)

Release date:  September 3rd, 1993

Run time:  117 min

Studio:  Polygram Filmed Entertainment 

Cold Pursuit - Movie Review

Cold Pursuit (2019)

Cold Pursuit is a black comedy/crime thriller starring Liam Neeson. It tells the story of a snowplow driver who goes on a revenge quest after some drug dealers who killed his son. Released on February 8th, 2019, the film made just a little more than its budget back, grossing $76 million on a $60 million budget. The film received positive reviews as well.

THE GOOD

Cold Pursuit was a movie that I didn't see when it first came out. After Taken 3, I never bothered seeing very many Liam Neeson action movies because I thought they would be as terrible as that. I regret that completely after watching this movie! I saw this in my local theater a couple of days ago and it was really, really good! It seemed to look like your typical Liam Neeson revenge thriller in its marketing but it absolutely is not! This is a clever, weird and surprisingly hilarious dark comedy with elements of crime thriller and action. Liam Neeson is great here, he isn't your typical Neeson revenge thriller guy here, he feels more human. When he kills the first drug dealer on his revenge quest, you can see the nervousness in him and it's obvious that he does not want to do what he is doing. He even contemplates suicide early on in the movie after finding out his son is dead. The standout here is Tom Bateman as the villain, Viking. He was so gloriously over the top, so much fun, he steals every fucking scene he's in! There is also this kid, Nicholas Holmes, who plays the villain's son, he gives a fantastic performance here too! He also gives one of the best lines in the entire movie. The humor is great too, it's very subtle, but also very dark. There's a scene where Liam Neeson is riding in a cab with a hitman and Barbie Girl by Aqua plays. I thought it was pretty random, but it did get a giggle out of me. The last scene in the movie got a huge laugh out of me, I didn't see it coming at all, and it was hilarious! There are moments of great action here too, I wouldn't necessarily call this an action movie, but when it happens, it's violent, bloody and brutal. Whenever Liam Neeson punches somebody in the face, blood just starts gushing out of their mouth and nose and you hear the impact of those punches, it's solid stuff! There is also a terrific shootout in the final act, its filmed and edited wonderfully, you can actually tell what's going on and it's not migrane inducing like Taken 2 and 3. 

THE BAD

If you are not the kind of person who likes to be patient while watching a movie, don't watch this movie. It will be very offputting for people who are completely used to the typical pace and structure of your average Liam Neeson revenge thriller. It's not an issue for me at all but I just had to put it out there for people who will see that as a negative. My actual issues with the movie is that some characters are underutilized, like Laura Dern, who plays Liam Neeson's wife, she leaves no impact on the plot whatsoever, she is just there to slowly get upset at Liam Neeson overtime in the first half and then eventually leave and never see her again. I also wish they could've done so much more with the brother of Liam Neeson's character. *Spoiler Alert* At one point in the movie you find out that Liam Neeson's character's brother was at one point involved with the drug cartel that Liam Neeson is hunting down, which was an interesting subplot, but they don't really do much with it.

CONCLUSION

Cold Pursuit is a very good movie! It wasn't at all what I was anticipating, but in the best possible way. It does have a flaw or two but I still highly enjoy it! It was funny, exciting, the acting was great, the writing is great, and it was just a great time!

8.9/10  -  GREAT

Pros:

- Great moments of action

- Very funny

- Wonderful performances

- Liam Neeson feels more humanized than usual

Cons:

- Underutilized characters and plotline

- Can be offputting to many.

FILM INFORMATION:

MPA rating:  R (for strong violence, drug content, and some language including sexual references)

Release date:  February 8th, 2019

Run time:  119 min

Studio:  Lionsgate

BAD MOVIES: A Good Day to Die Hard

A Good Day to Die Hard (2013)

It's been a while since I have done one of these so why not review something that is truly awful? A Good Day to Die Hard was released on February 14th, 2013. It was slammed by critics and audiences, but was a box office success, earning $304 million on a budget of $92 million. A Good Day to Die Hard is an absolute disgrace to the Die Hard franchise, the only bad Die Hard movie, it is one of the worst sequels ever made and also one of the worst action movies ever made. How bad is this movie? Let's find out!

The Good

There isn't a single redeeming quality in this film.

The Bad

Where the fuck do I start? The action sequences are terrible, the cinematography is atrocious, the acting is horrible, there is absolutely no tension whatsoever, the movie doesn't even have a fucking villain! Let's talk about the action sequences and cinematography. This whole movie is an eyesore! There is so much shaky cam and quick cuts, both in the action sequences and in the talking scenes! I swear to fucking god they couldn't even keep the camera still for one god damn second! It also felt like they couldn't even keep a shot going for more than 3 seconds! If you like movies like Taken 3 or Alex Cross or The Hunger Games, this movie is right up your alley! There is zero tension in this entire film either. If you thought John McClaine was invincible in Live Free or Die Hard, just wait until you see this one, he doesn't even feel human here! Near the beginning of the movie, he is in this huge fucking car chase in Moscow, and he literally rolls the vehicle he's driving 3 or 4 times, he gets out of it, PERFECTLY FINE! No blood on him, no sign of broken bones or anything! Speaking of no blood, this movie is rated R, but yet this is one of the least brutal, most bloodless R-rated action movies I have ever seen! This is essentially a PG-13 movie that was just given the R rating to fool the fans! Live Free or Die Hard is far more violent than this is and that actually was rated PG-13! This film is also painfully unfunny, this film tries so hard to be funny at times and always fails! The dialogue is super painful, pretty much every single line of dialogue that comes out of Bruce Willis and Jai Courtney is either father and son bickering bullshit, terrible comedy and exposition. Now that I mentioned the lead stars, let's talk about the acting. What fucking acting? There isn't a single good performance here! Jai Courtney does his signature stoic, boring acting, and Bruce Willis is pretty much in the background the entire time unless the script needs him for an action sequence, and all he does when action isn't happening is being the annoying comic relief! This film doesn't even have a villain for most of it! There is this awful, forced twist in the climax where this Russian guy that the leads have to protect turns out to be the villain, but that doesn't last long because he's killed off like 5 minutes after the twist is revealed! Now that I think about it, I got some serious Halloween (2018) flashbacks happening, but that's for another review. 

In Conclusion

A Good Day to Die Hard is completely unwatchable. There is no plot, the cinematography and action sequences are a total nightmare that could very possibly give you motion sickness, the acting from everybody is atrocious, there is no tension, making the movie completely unexciting and boring. I hated this movie! We got 4 fantastic Die Hard movies already, there is literally no reason to watch this trainwreck unless you review movies and want to share your misery with your audience!

0/10  -  COMPLETE DISASTER

Pros

- None

Cons

- Terrible action

- Lack of tension

- No story

- Awful acting

- Frantic cinematography 

- Choppy editing

- No likable characters

Film Information

MPA rating:  R (for violence and language)

Release date:  February 14th, 2013

Run time:  101 min

Studio:  Twentieth Century Fox

Poltergeist (1982) - Movie Review

POLTERGEIST (1982)

INTRODUCTION

Poltergeist is a horror film that was released in 1982, directed by Tobe Hooper and produced by Steven Spielberg.  It tells the story of a family who discovers their house is haunted.  As they discover the haunting, they don't realise the spirits are hostile until they take their daughter into another dimension and they hire paranormal investigators to help get her back.  Poltergeist received massive critical acclaim, and was a major box office success, earning $121.7 million on a budget of $10.7 million, making it the 8th highest grossing film of 1982.  The film was also nominated for 3 Academy Awards at the 55th Annual Academy Awards ceremony in 1983 for Best Original Score, Best Sound Effects Editing and Best Visual Effects.  So let's take a trip back to 1982 to review this true horror classic.

THE GOOD

Poltergeist is a wonderful example of great storytelling both through dialogue and visuals.  The visuals are great!  It's no wonder why this movie got an Oscar nomination for visuals, they enhance the horror, they are insanely creative and you can tell so much time and effort was put into them.  The movie's tone and atmosphere is very unique, it combines a very Spielbergian tone similiar to something like E.T. or Gremlins and a strong dark horror tone, the sense of terror is always present when it needs to be.  The performances are fantastic, every actor (even the child actors) sell every emotion they have to show, especially fear, especially the boy and the mom.  Seriously, when you nearly get eaten by a tree or fall in a pool and see a bunch of caskets with skeletons randomly coming out of the ground, I am pretty sure you would be freaked the fuck out too.  For a PG movie this movie is pretty intense too!  There is some intense imagery, like the scene where this guy hallucinates peeling off his face, and it's super bloody and gory and you see most of his skull, and the skeletons coming out of the pool, and the whole final act in fact is pretty intense for a PG movie.  Apparently this was originally rated R but somehow Spielberg and Hooper managed to convince the MPAA to change it to a PG.  This movie's musical score is phenomenal, it's peaceful and whimsical when it needs to be and it's intense and extremely haunting when it needs to be. Lastly, the cinematography!  This movie has some of the best cinematography I have ever seen in a horror film.  

THE BAD

I don't have any problems with this movie whatsoever.  Maybe if you're like 12-13 years old, you might think this movie looks cheesy.

CONCLUSION

Poltergeist to me is the greatest haunted house movie of all time.  It hits all the notes a horror movie like this should hit perfectly!  The special effects are fantastic for a movie from 1982, the tone has perfect balance and it has great performances.  This is yet another essential film for any horror lover or people wanting to get into horror films.

Stay tuned for my upcoming reviews for Friday the 13th Part 2 and Fatal Attraction.

10/10  -  MASTERPIECE

Pros:

- Perfect balance of tone and atmosphere

- Special effects

- Great intensity for a PG movie

- Jerry Goldsmith's musical score

- Performances

- Cinematography 

Cons:

- None

FILM DETAILS

MPAA rating:  PG (Reason N/A)

Release date:  June 4th, 1982

Run time:  114 min

Studio:  Warner Bros. Entertainment (Current distributor), Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Pictures

SOURCES:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Poltergeist_(1982_film)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/55th_Academy_Awards

Friday the 13th (1980) - Movie Review

FRIDAY THE 13TH (1980)

Friday the 13th is a slasher flick that was released in the summer of 1980 with a similar premise to the iconic 1978 classic, Halloween.  A group of counselors at an abandoned summer camp called "Camp Crystal Lake" are picked off one by one by a mysterious, brutal serial killer. The film was met with largely negative critical reception at the time of release but was a giant box office success. It earned $59.8 million on a budget of $550,000. This is a very important film to me, it may not be my favorite installment in the franchise but it did start my all time favorite horror franchise.  I started a new sort of look for my reviews so they can at least look better.

THE GOOD

Friday the 13th has a better concept for a slasher film than Halloween in my personal opinion.  It's more like Texas Chainsaw Massacre in the sense that instead of the terror coming to the victims, the victims go to the terror, which is scarier when you think about it. The tone and atmosphere is absolutely wonderful, it always feels like something bad may happen even when there's nothing happening at all. The performances are surprisingly good for a movie with a cast of first time actors and an actress who didn't give a shit about the project whatsoever (Betsy Palmer). Betsy Palmer acts her ass off when her character is finally introduced. (this movie is 40 years old now so I am going to reveal it, I don't give a fuck about spoilers) For those who don't know and somehow never came across this franchise, she plays Pamela Voorhees (the killer in the film), who vows revenge in counselors who caused the death of her son, Jason one day back in 1957. She is a wonderful villain, and Palmer's performance absolutely sells it!  She is creepy as fuck, the way she talks in Jason's child voice is unsettling. The technical aspects are very impressive for a movie with a budget of only $550,000.  The cinematography is beautiful!  The POV shots, still shots, wide shots for example all work wonderfully!  The musical score is nothing short of iconic, and of course it features the iconic staple of the franchise, the sound, ch, ch, ch, ha, ha, ha!  Now this is a slasher film, so the most important aspect are the kills!  For the most part they are great!  Tom Savini's phenomenal practical effects make them special, like the axe to the one girl's face, the arrow through Kevin Bacon's throat (the best kill in the movie), and of course the classic decapitation of Pamela Voorhees!

THE BAD

As I said in my intro, this isn't my favorite entry, I do have quite a few problems. My first problem is some of the kills. In the section "THE GOOD", the key word leading to that was "for the most part".  Why is that?  That is because of two things, several kills were cut short to avoid the X rating at the time, and there are several offscreen kills.  One offscreen kill does work, but the rest of them didn't, creating an inconsistency in quality of the kills.  This movie could have also used some more editing.  I am all for slow paced movies, especially horror!  Films like The Shining, the first 3 Paranormal Activity films, The Thing (1982) and Wes Craven's New Nightmare are terrific examples of slow paced horror done right!  However; there are scenes in this movie that really drag on for too long.  There is a scene that I am sure everyone who has seen this movie would know what I am talking about, where the final girl makes coffee in a cabin, and they show the ENTIRE process!  They never cut to anything else that could be going on, you literally witness the entire process of the making of coffee. The last criticism I have is the twist when they reveal the killer.  It's not Friday the 13th Part V: A New Beginning levels of bad (that's for another time), but I did have a problem with it.  The twist was super predictable, because of the fact that she was obviously being deceptive when she introduces herself, and when you see her pull up to the cabin, she was driving the EXACT SAME JEEP that was shown when the mysterious killer was driving in the first act!

CONCLUSION

Friday the 13th is one of the most important films in the history of horror movies.  It helped shape the slasher genre as we know it today, and it gave birth to one of the most iconic and profitable franchises of all time. I don't love this film but I do enjoy it for what it is and what it started.  This is a good film overall and I highly recommend it for people who love this franchise and want to get into horror films.  In my eyes, this is essential viewing.

6.8/10   -   OKAY

Pros:

- Musical score

- Cinematography 

- Practical effects

- Acting

- Great villain

- Great mood/atmosphere

Cons:

- Pacing is too slow

- Some kills are cut too short or left offscreen

- Predictable twist

Thanks for reading my review, I hope you all enjoyed it and enjoyed my new way of writing them.  I will be reviewing the remaining 11 films in the franchise in the near future!  Stay tuned for my next review, for the 1982 horror classic, Poltergeist!

Film details

MPAA rating:  R (reason N/A)

Release date:  May 9th, 1980

Run time:  95 min

Studio:  Paramount Pictures

Sources:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Friday_the_13th_(1980_film)

Rocketman - Movie Review

Rocketman is a musical biopic about rock music icon, Elton John.  It was released last year in May, so I am reviewing this really close to its 1 year anniversary.  I am going to get right into this, this movie is wonderful!  This movie has energy, great cinematography, absolutely wonderful performances, and some of the best musical numbers I have seen in a musical movie that didn't come out in the 70s and 80s.  Taron Egerton is perfect as Elton John!  His commitment and passion for this role really shines!  He sings the songs himself, he really shines in the dramatic elements, it really felt like I was watching Elton John on screen!  The other actors are fantastic too, especially Bryce Dallas Howard as Elton's mother, she was cold hearted bitch, but she did have charisma, and that's because of a great performance. The musical numbers are also magical!  They are energetic, the singing is amazing, the staging is absolutely phenomenal!  The standout numbers for sure are Saturday Night's (Alright for Fighting), Crocodile Rock and I'm Still Standing.  The musical numbers really add to the very unique feel of this movie, it never felt like your traditional biopic, even though technically it is.  Rocketman is a movie I highly recommend, especially if you love Elton John!  It's so much fun, it's a very briskly paced film with tons of energy and amazing musical numbers, and a truly oscar worthy performance from Taron Egerton.

Grade:  A+

Run time:  121 min

MPAA:  R (for language throughout, some drug use and sexual content)

Studio:  Paramount Pictures